You know she has that Scooby-Doo tongue.

A.J. DaulerioA.J. Daulerio|published: Fri 29th August, 15:00 2008

You see I don't, I don't work with any exact boundaries of the law because I wasn't consulted when the god damn laws were made. No, instead nameless, faceless politicians, the so called protectors of the moral majority decide what is right and what is wrong. I mean come on. I govern my life around my own personal code of ethics, and I suggest that you do the same. That way if, within the constructs of my own morality, I were to do something that is considered illegal, so be it. I feel no guilt whatsoever and furthermore, if I were to buckle under the social weight of the system by adhering to laws that I do not truly believe in then I would be extinguishing the very fire of patriotism and individuality. So in a sense, by having sex with Natasha, I'd be preserving the rights our forefathers fought and died for, right? If you would like to some day be a manager at Shenaniganz, then you have all the drive and initiative needed to be a Deadspin advertiser. Go here, to find out more. This week's overachievers: • Coors Light •; Hotflops • Puma • Starwood Hotels • T-Mobile • Unscrew America


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