i said it before and i've said it again, if you've never tried the last second u turn to avoid the po, you need to get out of the cave. that being said, wojo would have split the trap and hustled back on d

I'm just throwing this out for consideration. It probably comes up short of Redick still, but it's worth thinking about: Alex Rodriguez. Before you blow it off as not even close, just imagine what his mug shot would look like.

And, while it wouldn't be unbridled joy, it would be infinitely more jokes: A.C. Green.

Can you just re-post this story every couple days? It just brings a smile to my face...

Actually, that poem is better than anything Redick has ever written -- J.J. always used the tried and true method (for 7th graders) of the aabbccdd rhyme scheme.

what about sharapova...i bet she's a sexy drunk

UM, I've never done that. But maybe that's because I lead a painfully dull life.

Thanks for the shout-out, Will. I'll burn those photos now. Can I think of a single athlete? No. Can I think of a single broadcaster? Oh, about 400 of them. Hey everyone, let's imagine what the footage of JJ being booked at the station might look like!...

Sorry, bad link. Let's see that footage again!

I've already made my Dick Vitale joke, and if I'm not mistaken, it was the 1st!! BTW, I thought it was written "U-ey" ?

Rather than getting caught drunk driving, I think the AC Green story would be funniest if he got caught with a hooker.

"What about sharapova...i bet she's a sexy drunk" UM - Sharapova would make a sexy burn victim

You know, if he was a true Duke, he would have just taken his car over a convenient jump instead of trying to pull a u-turn. No way the sheriff could have caught him that way. "That Duke boy is in a heap a trouble."

I'm going to go celebrate this banner year for Duke Athletics when I go home by putting my head in the oven. (Sorry for potential repost; drawing a comment error)

Im was just watching Jim Rome and Around the Horn. No mention of JJ Redick on either one. Whats up with that???

The u turn is a lot of fun, but nothing compared to watching someone else try it and get nailed - especially if that someone was JJ Redick...

Me neither MC79, but this is Ohio, and I live in fear of having Carl Monday on my ass. To quote Ice Cube, today, was a very, very good day on Deadspin.

I don't know about Wojo, but Chris Collins would have whined/cried his way out of it.

Also, you know, Jay Bilas is a lawyer, he could have gotten out of this.

An A-Rod DUI would be outstanding...I'm picturing him trying to slap the breathalyzer out of the cop's hands prior to arrest. Would his lips look purple in the mug shot too?

Big Daddy Drew gets his name in lights forever and all I got was this lousy t-shirt. At least I've still got the World Cup Pants Party. Come on No Hands on Balls!

JJ Is Redick ulously Drunk.

hell, at this point i'm flat out praying that Gigi Buffon picks up a dui sometime between now and saturday morning we could use the break

Wow. This is obviously the biggest news story of the past week and definitely merits two separate posts in one day. Well done. Obviously I'm kidding. Kid only had a .11 blood alcohol level...what's that? Two, three beers? He was probably 20 minutes and a glass of water away from being legal. Oh wait...that's right...this makes Duke look bad; it's hatred for Duke & Redick! Time to pile on! That being said, and my Duke bias obviously on display, it was still a stupid move--when you've got that much to lose (even though it may not hurt his draft status that bad), especially as far as your character is concerned, you just don't risk driving after having a couple of beers. Or one beer. Now he gets to deal with the fallout.

Word on the street is that J.J. tried to open the car door and jump out, but he has absolutely no handle.

William, About fucking time someone put this in perspective. No doubt the Duke-hater versions of the Black Panthers or Media Nitwits who are trying to capitalize on the lacrosse persecution will certainly use this to divine deep meaning and prove their own existence as fans of teams that lost to Duke anytime between 2001 and the present. .11 used to be .01 over what was the legal limit in nearly every state (as recently as 10 years ago). A negligible amount to what we used to think of as drunk, and subject to error. It's not an excuse, and the falling on his face is funny for the very religious mama's boy, but it's not hooliganism. Stupid and childish, just like anyone else who gets a DWI (the risk vs. reward is too great thanks to our Draconian punishment of people who make very small errors in judgment).

UM: I get out of the cave plenty, I just choose not to drive back to it drunk. You live in DC...METRO-it pal. Or at least let me know when you're cruising the streets so I can give you a wide berth or I can make it an "in cave" evening. Big Daddy Drew: You've been steppin up your game lately -- good work!

William, let me share my joy. If you've a Duke bias I can't help but I can tell you how much your fellow Dukestir brought pleasure to my little world. I dragged myself home after a long day laboring for The Man, no time to watch pussyball on the computer or even do a quick score check, glance at my email, and head over here for a little synopsis. And what do I find? Words that sing, that speak to my heart. Poetry. And proof that JJ is even pitiful when having his mug shot made. I mean Tom DeLay showed us the way. Thank you Deadspin. My day is complete.

I've never been under the impression that Deadspin was a news site. That's what ESPN, SI.com, etc. are for. Deadspin is a humor site. And JJ Redick getting busted for DUI is funny. (I don't even pay attention to college sports, and I think it's hilarious.)

Kid only had a .11 blood alcohol level...what's that? Two, three beers? He was probably 20 minutes and a glass of water away from being legal. I don't want to sound reactionary, and I know that you tempered that statement with a second paragraph, but still: that statement is pretty despicable, William. Now, I don't necessarily disagree -- .11 is not Sutton-drunk -- but by defending J.J.'s .11 BAL, you reinforce the stereotype that Duke students view the law as pliable to the 21st century's version of the landed elite. (Anyway, we're all products of our environment: just as your Duke background makes you prone to defend douchebags, I'm used to lecturing young Marines on the idiocy of driving drunk.)

william- most of the banter has been in good fun. i too enjoy duke quite a bit and i've also been a jj fan since he was a junior in high school (when i met wojo). that being said it was only a .11 and while that's nothing to completely dismiss its potential for comedy still exists. if he'd blown a .22 the joking would be far less appropriate. Rumor has it he was arrested by Officer Exree Hipp and his partner Walt Williams

I still can't get over the popped collar...

Unsilent, Wrong. It was Officer Big Mac that nabbed him. And threw him in the backseat with Marcus "Hamburgler" Vick. Still under investigation: That cocaine and hookers scandal enveloping Mayor McCheese. Big Ups to McDonaldland.

Two thoughts reading these comments: 1) The best sports writing in America can be found in the comments section of Deadspin. 2) I want to see someone paste Redick's face over the Nick Nolte mugshot. I think I would cry hot tears of joy.

It absolutely could not have happened to a better person...except for Joe Buck.

Maybe JJ did this to try and bury the bigger story that no one is talking about. Yet. Draft Express is reporting he has a serious back problem and needs surgery and could miss up to four months. That will affect his draft staus more than a DWI. Obvs.

bigt- i never said i was drunk at the time! shit, i live in dc, the only in town driving i do is to and from work. i was merely stating that i am not above performing an evasive maneuver to avoid the wrath of a lazy speed trap. and yes, i'd pay money to see an article on a drunken joe buck with his teeth marks on marv albert's ass YES!

I don't want to sound reactionary, and I know that you tempered that statement with a second paragraph, but still: that statement is pretty despicable, William. Now, I don't necessarily disagree -- .11 is not Sutton-drunk -- but by defending J.J.'s .11 BAL, you reinforce the stereotype that Duke students view the law as pliable to the 21st century's version of the landed elite. Actually, Captain, I don't defend douchebags; I prosecute them. I view, say, defendants who have barely over an ounce of marijuana differently than those with two, three, or four ounces or more, just as the law does. I also take into account their criminal background when judging their, er, "douchebag"-iness. In my opinion, .11 isn't as serious as a .22. It doesn't matter if it's a Duke player, Carolina player, some farmer in Boise--it's still just .11. And, whether you agree or not, if he had simply just waited longer before leaving the party, or the bar, or wherever he was, he stood a chance of being under the legal limit. But, as I said, he took that risk and now he's got to deal with it. Personally, I'm thankful that he didn't get into an accident or, worse, hurt or kill someone. I don't understand how that makes my comment "despicable," and I don't know how that reinforces any stereotype you may see. College athletes all over the country do stupid things like drive drunk and they get caught. Redick's just the latest in a long line and certainly won't be the last.

Major Disaster: Deadspin's definitely a funny site and a great forum for all of us commentators to sound off on all kinds of sports stories. But, Will seems to be teetering on the edge of being a news site, especially if he keeps breaking stories like the possible names in the Grimsley affidavit. To me, Deadspin is way more of a credible "news site" than ESPN, the worldwide leader in sports entertainment.

Anyone else waiting to hear that JJ's trial will be presided over by Judge Larry Rose?

William: If you have to tell everyone you're kidding right after you write a vague opening sentence, you're probably not being all that articulate. Are all of these references Dukes of Hazzard related? Because they're soaring over my head right now, and I feel displaced.

"No more displacing of the displaced!" ...and this is not a dukes of hazzard reference.

Sorry, William. Point of clarification: J.J. Redick's eminent douchebaggery is unrelated to his blood alcohol level.

TacoBell: Ask and you shall receive. Without further ado, Redick as Nick Nolte.

I cannot believe I am writing this, but I actually feel bad for the guy. Not for the DUI charge - but because of the inferences that are being drawn as a result. Admit it, you yourself have likely driven when you knew you should not have. I for one know that I have done so and thankfully I did not hurt anyone. However, the worst case scenario that I would face is a suspended license and my grandparents reading about it in the court news in the local paper. The consequences appear to be much harsher for Redick - already GM's are wispering about Redick and his position in the draft could be in serious jeopardy. Is that really just to judge a 21 year old soley on one mistake? Especially in light of recent events involving athletes, Redick appeared to conduct himself appropriately at the time of arrest.Things are going to happen fellas - its how you conduct yourself after the event that matters the most. Let's see how Redick will respond. It just might suprise you.

I'm ust suprised that he consented to the the breathalizer - that is what happened, right? You think someone would have drilled into his head that when in doubt just refuse the test. I don't know what NC's laws are like on refusal to blow, but I have a hunch that its likely just an automatic suspention of your licence - that's a lot better than a DUI conviction on your record. JJ's a fine upstanding citizen though, so I'm sure he just did as he was told - after he threw that U-turn...

Derek wins. Holy fuck that was funny.

To paraphrase the once-funny Mel Brooks... Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when a whiny, bacne'd, collar-popping douchebag gets busted for driving with three Bartles & Jameses in his tummy.